When Natalie was pregnant with our first child, we drove down to Babies ‘R Us in Van Nuys and started a gift registry. This was a whole new world, and we quickly realized that baby supplies are a multi-billion dollar industry. It was overwhelming. How could there be so many diaper bags and strollers to choose from?

One of the best baby gifts we ever received was a little Fisher Price booster seat to be used at mealtime. It was lightweight, had an adjustable food tray, could be strapped to almost any chair, and took up little space, eliminating the need for a separate high chair. To this day, we still have that booster seat for young families who visit. Who knows — maybe our own grandkids will use it someday?

The kids used to sit in that booster seat for hours. At the dinner table, for TV shows, during church services, at church potlucks. We fed them snacks, we laughed together, sang together, told stories, and played peek-a-boo, all in that little chair. Don’t worry, they weren’t trapped in it all the time. But they spent a lot of time in that chair, a lot of training, a lot of playing, and a lot of life happened right here, in that little seat.

Whether your child is a young toddler still in a booster seat, or already a teenager, one of the most important lessons you can teach them is the idea of spiritual authority. How can this be done in loving, meaningful ways?

I preached on this several months ago at Calvary Church. In this study of Colossians 3:20-21, we learned…

• What is means to honor your father and mother
• How to handle temper tantrums
• Should we discipline our kids? How? When?
• What does it mean to “provoke our children” to anger?
• God’s wisdom in the parent-child relationship

Here’s the audio:

Thanks for listening. For a complete list of all my sermons organized by book of the Bible, please visit the sermon hub on my blog.

I was in the local library the other day and noticed this sign: “Where to Find Help With Tough Topics.”

It was an alphabetical list of struggles like Abuse, Abortion, and Alcohol, and where to find books in the library catalog on each of these topics.

At the bottom, the sign said, “We know some things are tough to talk about. As librarians, we are here to help — just ask.”

I’m glad public places are willing to bring up tough topics. People are hurting. As Christians, we should be the first to encourage and pray with others and help them with life problems.

Wouldn’t it be great if we knew our Bibles well enough to talk about these sensitive issues? Good news! We have a New Counseling Class to help you with just that.

Starting tomorrow, Sunday, March 16, we’re offering a new equipping class at Calvary Church called “Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands.” It will teach you how to use God’s Word to bring help and hope through a variety of mental health and counseling issues. Join us tomorrow at 8:45am in the Music Room!

(if you aren’t in the West Hills area, I have taught this class a couple times before at both Crossview Bible Church and Immanuel Baptist Church and have made the recordings available. You can listen to them here.)

May God say of us what the apostle Paul said of the Romans: “I myself am satisfied about you, my brothers, that you yourselves are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge and able to instruct one another” (Romans 15:14).

2 Timothy 3 warns that “in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, and abusive…”

With so much difficulty in this world and hostility toward God, it’s not a question of if you will face conflict, but when.

From Genesis 3 to Revelation 20, the Bible reminds us over and over that this world is a broken place, plagued by injustice and conflict. Cain murders Abel (Gen. 3). Jacob swindles Esau (Gen. 25:31). Rachel envies Leah (Gen. 30:1). Israel rebels against Moses (Num. 14:2). David covets and commits adultery (2 Sam. 11). Job is mocked by former friends (Job 30).

The pattern continues right on into the New Testament. The Corinthians sue each other (1 Cor. 6). Euodia and Syntyche bicker (Phil. 4:2). John Mark quits halfway through a project (Ac. 15:37-38). Alexander the coppersmith does Paul great harm (2 Tim. 4:14). Diotrophes loves to put himself first (3 Jn 9).

That’s not to say that everything is doom and gloom. Thankfully, there is still much that is true and beautiful and good in this world due to common grace. But as a whole, the world is at enmity against God (1 Jn. 2:15-17), and will lead to disappointment, conflict, and hurt.

Have you been mistreated? I would simply say this… Join the club. I’m not trying to downplay your pain or minimize the injustices that have been done. But guard your heart against self-pity as though your situation is categorically unique.

1 Peter 4:12 says Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you.

You are not alone. God knows. God sees. He loves. He hears your prayers. His Son is a great high priest who can sympathize with you (Heb. 4:14-16). Many good and godly people have been mistreated, and through the tears have learned to trust God, casting their cares before him, and continuing to run the race in faith.

Last Sunday at Calvary Church, we talked about the reality of conflict, and how to begin to pursue peace with those who have done us wrong. God is the ultimate peacemaker, and in Colossians 1, he models for us how we can make peace with those who have mistreated us. You can catch the audio or video using the links below:

Audio – visit the Sermon Page on our Calvary Church website

Video – visit our church’s Youtube channel or simply use the embedded file below. Thanks for watching!

I took my first biblical counseling class at The Master’s College under Dr. Wayne Mack some 25 years ago, have attended other counseling courses and seminars, and have been involved in pastoral counseling for almost twenty years now.

I’ve had the privilege of seeing marriages restored, addictions broken, and relationships healed. I’ve witnessed major breakthroughs, tough setbacks, waterfalls of tears, and sighs of relief. I’ve rejoiced with those who rejoiced, wept with those who wept, grieved over loss, exposed sin, exalted Christ, and pursued holiness. What a blessing to be an instrument in the Redeemer’s hands. And God wants to use you too! We are always in need of more counselors and disciple-makers. Just be prepared for a messy process.

Ministry is messy because relationships are messy. Never is this more evident than in the counseling room. When Paul spoke of “teaching in public and from house to house” (Acts 20:20), I think he had in mind the ideas of preaching and counseling. Some ministry is public. Other ministry is more private. All is to be biblical, and all is important.

As I mentioned last Friday, I recently taught a class called “Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands” based on the excellent study by Paul Tripp and Timothy Lane. I taught the material years ago at Crossview and it was a joy to go back through it again with a class here at Immanuel. I found it a great refresher course, yet brimming with fresh insights. If you’re interested in growing as a counselor or just being a better friend, consider listening to these lessons on your own. I’ve provided links to all the blog posts, audio recordings, and handouts below:

Week 1 – Do We Really Need Help?
(blog post | audio recording | handout)

Week 2 – The Heart is the Target
(blog post | audio recording | handout)

Week 3 – Understanding Your Heart Struggle
(blog post | audio recording | handout)

Week 4 – Following the Wonderful Counselor
(blog post | audio recording | handout)

Week 5 – Love I: Building Relationships in Which God’s Work Will Thrive
(blog post | audio recording | handout)

Week 6 – Love II: Building Relationships in Which God’s Work Will Thrive
(blog post | audio recording | handout)

Week 7 – Know I: Getting to Know People; Discovering Where Change is Needed (blog post | audio recording | handout)

Week 8 – Know II: Getting to Know People; Discovering Where Change is Needed (audio recording | handout)

Weeks 9 & 10 – Speak: Speaking the Truth in Love
(These sessions were condensed into one. There was no recording because we had a shorter teaching time and watched two videos on a single night)

Week 11 – Do Part I: Applying Change to Everyday Life
(blog post | audio recording | handout)

Week 12 – Do Part II: Applying Change to Everyday Life
(blog post | audio recording | handout)

In case it’s helpful, here are all handouts in a single PDF file:

Our class met for 90 minutes each week. For me, the right weekly format was to welcome everyone, have a time of prayer, teach a lecture and/or facilitate discussion of key highlights of the study guide, watch the instructional video, then have a few final minutes of closing discussion as time allowed. If you decide to host a class or would like more info, leave a comment below!

Many counseling and recovery programs stress the importance of accountability partners.

Heath Lambert, in his excellent book Finally Free, says, “If you are caught in a sin, you need to be restored by someone who lives by the Spirit. We are not designed to pull our way out of our spiritual ruts in our own strength. We need the help of other Christians. You will never be free from pornography until you acknowledge that in order to change you need the help of God through brothers and sisters in Christ” (p. 46).

This is true not only of pornography, but any other besetting sin including drunkenness, drug addiction, losing your temper, gambling, compulsive spending, cutting, worrying, discouraging thoughts, etc. We need others to help us, pray with us, hear our confessions, and ask us hard questions. But what exactly do these relationships look like?

One list of accountability questions right for any occasion can be found in Donald Whitney’s book, Simplify Your Spiritual Life. Here’s a sampling…

• What’s the best thing that happened to you since we met last?
• Do you have any unusual burdens or troubles this week?
• How’s your [teaching, hospitality, outreach, deacon, or whatever] ministry going?
• What has the Lord been teaching you recently?
• Have you had any evangelistic opportunities lately?
• Have you had any obvious answers to prayer recently?
• Where in the Bible have you been reading lately?  What impact has it had on you?
  • What else you have been reading? How has it impressed you?

Randy Alcorn, in his Purity Principle, gives some pointed questions related to sexual purity…

• How are you doing with God? Your spouse? Children?
• What temptations are you facing, and how are you dealing with them?
• How has your thought life been this week?
• Have you been spending regular time in the Word and prayer?
• Who have you been sharing the gospel with?
• Have you lied in any of your answers?
• How can I pray for you?

Last fall, I taught a series on Wednesday night called “Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands,” which dealt with a variety of counseling issues to help us grow in our walk with God and be used by him to serve others. In our final session, we discussed accountability. In this lesson, we shared…

• Key takeaways from this introduction to biblical counseling
• The importance of understanding your identity in Christ
• How to confront and restore someone who is struggling
• Helpful questions for any accountability relationship

Here’s the audio recording of my lesson:

And here’s a copy of the handout:

Thanks for listening. This is the final week in a 12-week biblical counseling class called “Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands.” For a complete list of sermons and Bible studies, please see my Teaching Page.

(This article contains Amazon affiliate links, which means by clicking through the link, a small percentage of any purchases will help me buy future books. Thanks for your support.)